Risako(Old Ver)
by PepperminTwists
Summary: When she died, she never expected to be reborn as the younger sister of Seto Kaiba. OC (NOW MOVED TO crumbledpaper)
1. Chapter 1: Intoduction and Beginning

_Disclaimer: I don't own Yugioh!_

_This story is un-betaed _

* * *

**Lub dub. Lub dub. Lub dub.**

_Where…where am I?_

**Lub dub. Lub dub. Lub dub.**

_W...What's that noise?_

**Lub dub. Lub dub. Lub dub.**

_Why is it so dark? How did I get here? What-oh._ Oh.

_That's right...I died. _

_But what _is_ this place? Heaven? Hell? _

_How am I conscious? _

**Lub dub. Lub dub. Lub dub.**

There was a dense, heavy pulse that throbbed steadily as questions desperately raced through my mind. I couldn't feel anything, not my limbs or any surface, nothing except a warmth that seemed to wrap around me like a warm blanket. It seemed like I was floating in space.

Weightless and slow.

No! Concentrate!

Okay, what's the last thing you remember?

My mind instantly filled with slideshows of red and black as my body throbbed in a faint memory of excruciating pain.

Ah, how could I forget? I had died by being violently hit by a drunk, speeding blue car. My internal organs and bones getting crunched and squished under heavy, foul-smelling tires as blood splattered across the sidewalk, painting the earth a brillliant, vermillion red.

I tried to close my eyes before realizing that I couldn't feel them as well. Inwardly sighing, I pushed the memory to the back of my head instead.

Maybe this is how the afterlife really is? If so, then it's a bit disappointing, and pretty boring. I mean, couldn't life of _at least _given us something to do once we were gone? Like maybe throw a big, colorful rave party and invite all the cool peeps like George Washington or something? Even though I'm not that big of a party person, it would of been at least _something._

For what seemed like forever, I floated in that weird pressing darkness. Spending my time either sleeping, being bored out of my mind or reflecting on a bunch of things from fruit cakes to the cure for cancer. I'm not sure how long I was in that timeless place. It could of been long years or mere minutes-just that one day, one sweet _glorious_ day, I was _finally,_ _FINALLY _released from that dark, sense-numbing prison of nothingness.

It started with a sudden movement in my 'orb', as I called it. I had perked up slightly before a couple of tense, stretched moments passed and I started to sadly pushed it off as some weird accident when I suddenly couldn't breathe. My mind whirled into overdrive as I realized that I needed _air _and my hands instantly tried to flail around, although to no avail.

The rest of my body tried to struggle, but it was soon enveloped in the same tight, slimy, thing that squeezed my face so tightly I thought I was about to die again-except this time via suffocation. For a split second, I comprehended that I could feel again before my mind returned to its frantic panicking.

Something strong and slightly dusty-feeling wrapped around my head, gently pulling me as more things grabbed the rest of my body that slowly slid out of the constricting object. Shrill screams rang in the air as a soft object rubbed all over my face-and I could finally breathe again!

In a few seconds, my strangely high-pitched voice joined the other one in shouting our sore lungs out. I was moved and _freezing _cold air whipped mercilessly at my body, making my cries louder, because _goddamn it this was __traumatizing! _What the _hell _just happened?! _Where am I!?_

My eyes snapped open_(when did they close in the first place) _and then instantly squeezed shut again at the blinding white lights and alarming weird blurry blue things that loomed above me. Something slightly ticklish moved over me, like the one that cleaned my face and wiped my body down before I was snuggly wrapped up in a thin cloth. Strong, sturdy objects(arms, I think) moved me before a shadow covered my face, and I slowly let my eyes open as I realized the thing holding me was blocking the lights from shining in my strangely sensitive eyes.

Slowly the world came into focus.

It was a person, a woman around her early thirties who looked like she'd just ran the mile.

The first thing I noticed were her eyes-an electrifying icy blue framed by long, thick black eyelashes that made them pop even more. Her skin was tanned and messy dark hair rested on her head, the ends tickling my cheek as she cradled me to her chest.

A thin sheen of sweat covered her face and a couple drops of the salty liquid rolled down the side of her face as she flashed me a weak, yet brilliant smile.

Her head slowly moved away, turning to face something else and I was angled towards another face that slowly cleared up.

This time it was a man with soft-looking brown hair that brushed the tip of his dark, intent blue-purple eyes. He was paler than the woman and in his arms was young boy who looked a lot like the man, except with shorter hair and eyes like the woman. A look of wide-eyed look of fascination painted across his face as the man whispered softly to him before leaning down to kiss the woman on the forehead.

"彼女は美しいです" He whispered, and I realized through my the haze of my garbled mind that they were speaking in a different language.

The sound was remotely Asian, maybe Chinese? But it had sort of a different tone to it.

The woman replied in a soft, raspy voice and I was carefully handed over to the man. He gently rocked his arms and hummed a soft tune as, against my wishes, I found my eyes closing.

In a few seconds, I was sound asleep.

* * *

The next few days passed in a blur as I realized that I had somehow gotten reborn_-REBORN-_and was now a baby again. At least it explained a lot of things, like my lack of motor control, how I have no control over my bladder, the frequent sleeps(which I spent sixty percent and more of my time doing), the constant need for food(...milk), and my messed up sight(although it wasn't that bad since I had glasses in my past life).

Just let me say, theres a reason you don't remember your childhood. It's freaking _embarrassing. _

And gross.

Two words. Diapers and breastfeeding.

_Awk_ward...

But other than that, I actually made a few accomplishments! Like learning my name, for example, although it wasn't really that hard with how often it was repeated.

They called me Risako.

It had a nice ring to it but I wasn't sure if I liked it better than my old name.

Along with that, I was also slowly learning their language. My new mother was 'Kaa-chan'(mom in their language), and my new father was 'Tou-san'(dad).

Everything was nice and all, but it was a bit difficult for me to grasp the fact that I was reborn. That I would never see my friends again, my old family. I never expected to miss them this much-but then again, you know what they say.

You never know what you have until you loose it.

Eventually, though, the feeling of loss crept away. I got used to my new life and decided that what was in the past would stay in the past. I had a new life now, and I would have to live in the present. From that day on, I made sure to make as little trouble as I could for Kaa-chan and Tou-san. I think they appreciated it.

There was one factor that further kept me in this world-my adorable big brother, Seto. Of course, he was technically older than me, so I'm not sure if I'm really allowed to call him 'adorable'…the name also ringed a small bell somewhere in my memories, but I just couldn't place a mental finger on it.

Seto wasn't obnoxious, in fact he was quieter than most children I've encountered, which was nice to my new baby ears. He would also play games with me, but kept gentle and mostly patient. I quickly found myself getting attached.

Life continued on pretty good. At around five months, I said my first word.

Kaa-chan was playing with me in the living room as Seto arranged some building blocks(which he loved to do, something that I will never understand) nearby and I had just been lost in the nice, peaceful moment when,

"K-K…"

My mother was on me in a second and trying to be encouraging by saying the words. Seto had momentarily stopped playing and was watching me with interest.

"K…Kaa. Kaa-c-chwa." I struggled, trying to force my clumsy, heavy tongue to form the foreign sounds, "K-Kaa-chan~."

I mentally fist pumped. Yes!

My mother cooed happily at me with her pretty, expressive eyesand kissed my cheek, chatting excitedly. When father had come home that night, I greeted him with a happy, "Tou-san!" and he instantly dropped the black leather messenger bag he was holding in surprise.

With a happy cheer, he lifted me up and lightly spun me across the room as I screamed in excitement. He and Kaa-chan exchanged happy words and I was kissed on the forehead. Seto even joined the love fest somewhere in between and we had a especially delicious dinner that night(well, to me at least, since mother _finally _allowed me some of the _real_ food).

Unfortunately, there were other not so joyous things. At around six months, I started the horrifying process know as teething.

Honestly? It was worse than using the bathroom in my pants and breast-feeding _combined. _

Just imagine bones slowly, _tortuously_ growing out of your sore, swollen gums-and JUST WHEN YOU THOUGHT IT WAS OVER, tadaaaa~ another _GODDAMN FRUKING_ tooth starts to come in!

There was a constant, burning itchiness in my mouth, worse than a million mosquito bites! Not to mention painful as well. _  
_

Luckily, Kaa-chan had a bit of experience and I was frequently given cool fruits to nom on, along with my teething rings that took turns being frozen in the freezer. Yay Kaa-chan!

By seven months I could sit upright, crawl, and gain enough control over my arms to slap them all over Seto's carefully built buildings, demolishing the blocks with glee as he angrily puffed up his(_adorable baby chipmunk) _cheeks at me while I giggled hysterically. Then he would redo the building somewhere else before I crawled over to bring it down again. It became a bit of a game, to see how fast Seto could build a building and if I could knock it over before he finished.

My big brother was smart for his age.

No, I'm not being bias! He was literally a prodigy!

Seto already knew how to write complete sentences, _with_ perfect grammar at age two! It was a bit degrading since I can't even say my first phrase yet and mentally, I was older than him by fourteen years.

Nine months came and went, and I could walk. After many hard, wobbly days of supporting myself along the soft yet sturdy couch to strengthen my leg muscles, I managed to slowly toddle over to a dumbfounded Seto who quickly ran off to tell Kaa-chan after a few seconds of shocked staring.

Then came my first birthday which was surprisingly just the family instead of a huge party as I was expecting from my previous experience in life. But I got a couple new toys and even managed to savor bit of cake, so it was pretty amazing! My cake was an ice-cream one(much to the delight of my STILL TEETHING GODDAMIT mouth), so…yeah.

I also received the first proper look at my new body in the mirror, something that had been bugging me for a while.

Held back from my face in a ponytail with two thin sky blue clips to hold back the tiny bangs, was mousy brown hair just like Tou-san and Seto's except with a certain messiness that foretold a future of fluffiness like Kaa-chan's.

Unfortunately, I had father's eyes too.

Not that his eyes were bad or anything, it was just that I was desperately hoping that I could of inherited mother's. But hey, you loose some and you win some, right? Although that didn't stop me from sulking for a day or two.

My skin was tawny like Kaa-chan along with the delicate female facial structure and slightly chapped, tiny pink petals that were my baby lips.

But all in all, I was…pretty. Overtaking the appearance of my previous body by a mile, in fact. It felt nice to say the least.

Now in my second year, I was fine-tuning all my newly re-gained skills along with learning more of the foreign language that was spoken everywhere around me. To my surprise, it was Japanese, the language of the otaku(which I once was once upon a time). But that year also came with an unexpected surprise.

The ragged birth of my new brother, and heart-wrenching death of my mother that changed our lives forever-for the worst.

A few days after my first birthday, Kaa-chan revealed the news that she was pregnant again with a hesitant yet beaming smile. We had all been surprised, but quickly recovered and thrown a small celebration.

From then on, Kaa-chan's belly started to swell. Although it was only by her fifth month that it was fairly obvious she was with a child, which was a bit strange, but that just meant that our new addition to the family was going to be slightly smaller than normal. A downside was that for the next nine months since the announcement, we had to deal with a overly-hormonal Kaa-chan who had mood swings every few hours(if not minutes).

As if she wasn't temperamental enough when she was normal.

A few months in, we found out that the child was gonna be a boy. The tension started to build until finally one night Seto and I were suddenly taken out of our bed, blanket and all, before getting set in the back of the car with an urgently conversing mother and father in the front.

I had just frowned, irritated, and rested my head on my brother's shoulder, letting the comfort of his warmth, the soft swaying of the car, and soft whispers lull me back to rest. Seto laid his head on mine and in a flash, we were back asleep.

After a while, the car stopped and the side door was wrenched open before we were carried by a unsteady Tou-san into the blindingly white hospital. It took a split second for Kaa-chan to huff out what was wrong before she was rushed down the hallway and away from sight as Seto and I were set down on the waiting chairs.

We half-listened and half-slept as Tou-chan softly explained to us that mother was having our baby brother right now.

Even from where we were, if I strained my ears hard enough and everything was silent, I could faintly hear Kaa-chan screaming and cursing through the walls. It honestly scared me and I felt my heart gave a sharp, uncomfortable twinge.

How much pain must she be in?

I scooted a little closer to Seto and after a moment, I dozed off again into a light sleep. It was the distressed mummers of my father that woke me up after what seemed like a minute.

Rubbing my eyes and getting out a silent yawn, I slowly slid down from my seat and clumsily walked over to tug on the worn blue jeans that he wore. "Tou-chwan? What wrong?" I mumbled my baby talk sleepily as he gently bent down to picked me up and cradled me to his chest, an equally tired and confused Seto is his other arm.

"Y-Your…Your K-Kaa-sans g-gone"

He stuttered out, his words strangely high-pitched and choked as he clutching us even tighter to him.

She was gone?

What did he mean she was-the words seem to hit me like a ton of bricks while my brother just tilted his head, confused.

"Where did she go? When will she come back?" Seto asked, sleep weighing down his voice.

"She-she's never coming back, Seto."

Kaa-chan was dead.

She was actually _dead_.

I hadn't known her for really that long if you compare it to how many years I still have left, but still! How could you _not_ know a person when they practically, no, _literally _raised you?

A shiver crawled down my spine as I thought of what our family would be like now. She had been like the sun in our small home. Stubborn, strong willed, fiery, and lighting up all the sad gray days, clearing away the gloomy clouds.

Bright, beautiful, and brave.

I…I _loved_ her.

And that made it hurt all the more.

My heart felt like it was twisting and my eyes started to burn. I felt like screaming until my lungs collapsed. Until she was back, standing in front of us and alright-because we wouldn't be able to hold together if she was gone.

No.

No. I couldn't be possible, could it?

Ha, this is all some sort of joke! Of course she's alive! She'll be fine by tomorrow, and we'll all laugh because she got us worried for nothing!

Tou-san moved and all of the sudden, we were in a room. It was white, like everything in the hospital, with a bed in the middle. On it was a human shaped lump covered by a chalky colored blanket. I felt sick to my stomach.

A nurse moved up to us, a small blue bundle cradled delicately in her arms.

Silently, she handed it to Tou-san as he let us both down before crouching down. Shifting the blanket, I heard him let out a choked gasp as he saw his youngest's face.

In a moment, as I leaned over to see, I understood why.

My new baby brother…looked exactly like Kaa-chan.

It was as if fate was mocking us.

With fluffy tufts of black peeking out from his blanket, he was the first one with mother's hair color, although his skin was pale like father's, and his eyes…as if on que, they fluttered open and I was torn between relief and disappointment.

He had Tou-san's eyes.

A small drop of salty liquid dripped on my brother's cheek and he scrunched up his prune-like face. Shakily reaching over, I wiped it off, marveling at the alien feeling of his wrinkly warm skin.

I guess...she really _was_ gone then.

For a split second, I felt anger. Pure, raw, anger-because how _DARE _she leave me! Leave _us_! How dare she… _It wasn't her fault,_ a small voice in my head said, if only we got here sooner, if only the doctors were better, if only she…if only, if only, _if only._

But it didn't happen and she was gone. Like _them. _

Hot, never-ending tears started to track their way down my face and my throat felt like it was trying to swallow a huge, pepper-coated cotton ball. I felt myself being pulled into a hug by Tou-san as my world blurred and reality hit me again and again and again.

After what seemed like a couple of hours, I finally cried all that I could and a glass of water was offered to me by a sympathetic looking nurse. My brother's name ended up being Mokuba, as per Kaa-chan's wishes and I felt another string in my memories being tugged. I was _so close _to figuring it out-but I just _couldn't! _It was so frustrating that I almost burst out sobbing again.

The drive home was silent as Seto held Mokuba, cradling him protectively. The best big brother.

My lips tugged up in a weak, sorry excuse for a smile, but didn't go any further. I felt dead inside.

When we got home, father put us to bed before mixing up a bottle of the many formula mixes that the hospital had given us. I guess it was a sorry-for-your-loss gift of sorts.

The moment Tou-san left my room after sloppily tucking me in, I snuck out of my bed and opened the door. Slipping out and silently closing it behind me, I instantly found Seto's room across the hall. Silently entering it, I across the cream colored carpet to his bed. As I stood there, Seto turned to face me.

"Risa?" He asked in a questioning tone, and I nodded.

"Seto... can I sleep with you?"

"Ok."

He scooted over as I snuck into the cover. The bed was already warm because of Seto, something I was grateful for as I curled up next to him. It took a couple minutes before I fell asleep, taking comfort in the presence of my big brother.

Sometime in the middle of the night, I awoke to father's sobs in the room next to ours and listened to it for a while. The heart-wrenching gasps and ragged breaths before burying my head in the covers and shuffling closer to Seto.

I would give him his privacy to grieve.

* * *

Now, you see, _Tou-san_ was the one that made the money in the family-almost rarely home with his job, slaving away to make money. But now with Mokuba to take care of, he wasn't able to go to work.

Luckily, his boss was sympathetic and allowed him a 6 month paid break, but no more than that.

So everyday, father taught us how to take care of Mokuba. When to feed him, how to change diapers, what he could and couldn't eat, etc. We didn't have enough money for a baby sitter since originally, Tou-san's job was barely enough to support three people comfortably. That was himself, Kaa-chan, and Seto. But then I came and he worked longer hours, and now Mokuba was here. Although mother is gone now, the money is still strained.

I have a feeling that somewhere in his heart, father half blamed Mokuba for Kaa-chan's death. It made him treat the clueless baby a bit coldly, whether he knew it or not. I think Seto noticed something too and he started, too, started to distance himself a bit from Mokuba. If anything, it was because he caught on a bit to Tou-san's example and knew that somehow, our brother was responsible for the reason his mother was gone, although it wasn't really Mokuba's fault.

He didn't exactly _ask _to be born, did he?

Six months came and went surprisingly fast, and father was gone.

Everyday, he would come home later and later and more tired every day. Starting from a minute or so to long, pressuring hours. Throwing himself into his work in hopes of numbing the pain that came with his wife's death, and leaving Seto and I to slowly raise Mokuba ourselves.

We tried to be normal, me teaching him and Seto how to do basic math and a bit of history seeing as I never learned the complicated Japanese Kana-Kanji thing, while Seto taught us the Japanese that he knew and the words he would write. Which was surprisingly a lot.

A year came and went, then another. Mokie(a nickname Seto came up with on a whim) turned out to be a gentle and quite spirit much like father(it still befuddled me how he and Kaa-chan got together with their clashing personalities-I guess the whole opposites attract thing really does exists), who held those he loved close to his heart, maybe a little _too _close-with a twist of passion when his emotions flared.

During that time, when all of us were still in the early stages of growing up, I tried to tie us three together. Tighter and tighter with the thickest, longest rope. It's important to have good relations with your family, something I unfortunately learned the hard way in my past life. But my plans and hopes weren't exactly satisfied. Seto's side was looser than Mokuba and I, but it was getting there.

I hope, at least.

He had his first and second birthday with just the three of us(Seto and I had ours too) and Tou-san got us some gifts, although he didn't bother showing up at all.

Not even calling to wish us Happy Birthday.

Within these two years, Mokuba managed to take his first step, speak his first words('Risa' first, to my delight *cough*braggingrights*cough*, shortly followed by a gurgled 'Seto'), and it was a third through the second year when we received the news of our father's hospitalization.

I had seen it coming for a while now, and as we stared blankly at the sunken, deprived face of the lifeless corpse that used to be our father, I could only felt a surge of anger in my chest that quickly mixed with a dark undertone of the bitter, sour tang of sadness_(the only parental figure I had left was gone now. And we were to fend for ourselves)_, pain_(Although he might of lost connection with us in the past few years, I can still remember a time when he was one of the people closest to me)_, regret_(I wish I had gotten a chance to tell him how much he means to me-to _us_)_, and guilt(_if only I had stopped him_).

But he would leave us when we had just let go of our mother? Did he not remember that he had three children to take care of? THE OLDEST OF WHICH WAS 7?! But he actually brought on his own death, knowing, _KNOWING _that we were unable to take care of ourselves! He was weak! Pathetic!

Hatred almost overwhelmed that anger, and I swore that day to never, _EVER _become that sad excuse for a parent. That I would keep Seto and Mokuba safe-that only the strongest of forces would pry them from my cold, unwilling, dead hands. And even then, I would fight my hardest.

Steeling my resolve, I briskly swept my brothers out of the suffocating white room to spend the final nights inside our house.

_(_Line Break_)_

A couple days later, we attended a dreary funeral where random people who I had never seen before whispered behind their hands at the 'poor orphan children' and our so-called 'relatives' robbed us of everything in our will(except for a some cash that I stole from my parent's drawer and stuffed in my pillow case) before we were promptly thrown in the orphanage.

The whole time, I barely managed to reign in my temper and had to stop Seto from going into a frenzy more than once. There would be time to deal with this, we just had to wait. It was best to plan ahead before making any moves.

The young caretaker looked tired and weary as she accepted us in the orphanage and showed us to our room, something the size of a walk in closet at the most. We would have to share, but it wasn't too much of a problem.

I placed the sheets I had taken from Seto's bed on top of the white one that was already laid down, and Seto placed the pillow he was holding onto it. Maybe it wasn't the best, or the most comfortable, but it was more than most of the kids here got.

I stuffed the money inside of the mattress, making sure it was in a safe place as Seto handed me the clothes crammed inside of his messenger bag-which I folded and placed on a small wooden drawer along with my sketchbook and a collection of regular and colored pencils. Seto's favorite chessboard was placed with them. On the ground, I put a small green alarm clock down. Finally, we replaced the thin, scratchy, moth-bitten blanket with our own fluffy one, again from Seto's bed(as it was the biggest).

And so began the next few years of our life.

* * *

_Thank you for reading the first chapter, I'll be rewriting the second one a bit(having already fixed this one up)._

_Everything's un-betaed, so please, _I BEG YOU, _to tell me if anything's wrong.__  
_


	2. Chapter 2: Adpotion

As I look back on it, the years seem to have gone by in a flash.

We eventually got settled into our new position and developed a loose schedule. For breakfast, lunch, and dinner, I would sneak into the kitchen to make food instead of going to the battlefield that was the dining room and fighting over every scrap.

Luckily, there was a small classroom at the orphanage where volunteers would come in and teach us, so we finally got some proper education. Suddenly finding ourselves with a lot of time, Seto took up chess while I started to draw more. It was a hobby in my past life, but I didn't have many opportunities to pick it back up after I was reborn. Mokuba would play occasionally play games with the other children, but he mainly curled up next to us and read a children's book.

One thing we all seemed to like, though, were games.

Well, I mean, most children(if not all) like games, but Seto and Mokuba were especially addicted to them. When not reading or playing chess, they would come up with a bunch of different games to play-and whenever we got some spending money from doing odd jobs, they almost always went to buying a new board game(Mokuba's preference), card games(Seto's preference) or the occasional guessing game(me). Seto's especially like this thing called 'Duel Monsters'(I shook off the feeling that screamed deja vu. It was just a card game for goodness sake!). Almost every time we went out, we had to drag him away or he'd end up spending the majority of our cash on packs of cards like some sort of crazy card otaku.

I myself didn't understand the game that well, but Mokuba kinda did. Which made me feel a little stupid. But then he was my adorable little brother so I couldn't hold it against him...

That dumb card game wasn't any fun anyway.

Anyway, the orphanage actually had a few bullies! It was definitely like something out of the cliche school movie, except they weren't popular and instead beat up kids for toys and food instead of money and homework. Luckily, they quickly learned not to mess with any of us...I won't go into much detail. Let's just say that they're now scarred for life. Physically _and _mentally.

On the topic of family, now that Tou-san was gone, Seto started to accept the fact that we were the role models for Mokuba and were suppose to raise him, even if we were only a few years older than him and were merely children ourselves. It was nice to see Seto slip off his guard for a little while, and when I saw him doing those small things, maybe if it was just giving Mokuba the bigger piece of a split candy bar, I knew he cared about him. About us.

And-even though we were stuck in less than pleasant conditions without parents and a regular life-it was alright because we had each other. And for now, that was all we needed.

Months went by in what seemed like a blur, and sometimes, I felt as if we would be stuck in here forever. Locked in this tiny prison and not being able to see the world until they kicked Seto out when he was old enough. Then me. Then Mokuba.

I feared for the future, of living desperately on a street with barely enough to get by, our lives passing us by like we were bystanders watching a car race.

The thing was, Seto, Mokuba, and I got lots of adoption requests. It wasn't as if nobody wanted us-it was just that they didn't want the full package. And we three came as a special half-price bundle that no one had the time to deal with.

Two and a half year passed. Seto was ten, Mokie was five, and I was seven and a half when we got an announcement.

"Children," Miss Rui, one of the orphanage workers announced suddenly as she walked into the classroom, "today, Mr. Kaiba will be paying us a visit-" I tuned her out for a moment when I heard that name. It was familiar just like Seto and Mokuba…oh! I was so close to figuring it out! What was the final piece?! "-So be sure to behave!" She finished up with a smile and chatter erupted around us.

No wonder. This was the first thing that has ever happened in the orphanage other than new additions, and many kids were talking about the possibility of adopted by this Mr. Kaiba. Apparently, as I found by listening to the not-so-subtle gossip, he was the famous owner of a big business. If anyone landed with him, they would've gotten a first-class ticket to living the good life.

Ha, I highly doubt it. He was probably here to show off to the public. Orphanages and the _poor poor parent-less children _are one of the things sure to win the people's hearts. Although if they really had hearts, they would come here and adopt one of us themselves.

I've seen all the kids here, and they're all the same, just in different forms.

They're all broken.

Besides me, I saw Seto adopt a thoughtful expression as Mokuba rambled on excitedly to us, caught up in the dreams the other children wove. But I was more focused on Seto.

I know that face. What was he planning now?

One o'clock came and everyone was in the 'living room', their faces pressed to the windows, trying to see Mr Kaiba, trying to catch his attention, trying to be as perfect as possible so maybe _maybe _he would take them away from here. I stood on my tippy toes and tried to see past the other kids from the back(no way was I joining that compressor of animals just to get a peek of some snobby rich lug). I was unsuccessful, but managed to catch a glimpse of an impressive looking white limo pulling up to our street and crowds of reporters crowding the lawn before another body blocked my sight.

Soon, I heard the snapping of various cameras going off and a few minutes later, the door opened to reveal a stern looking man with graying black hair, sideburns, big eyebrows, and a mustache. I stepped back as everyone surged from the windows to crowd around him, bragging about how they were the best at math or blah blah blah Oh Mr. Kaiba your suit looks really nice! It's as white as the falling snow! Hey, that reminds me of this really sophisticated poem want to hear it, etc etc.

Looking around, I realized that the oldest was no where to be found.

"Mokie, do you know where Seto is?" Mokuba, who was next to me, blinked and looked around before realizing that his big brother was gone, "I don't know, Risa-nee. Maybe he got lost!"

I hummed thoughtfully and took Mokuba's hand. After all, it was possible that he got lost in this crowd.

"C'mon, lets go find him."

We looked around the living room first, pushing past the huge mass of bodies that had gathered for Mr. Kaiba's appearance for about twenty minutes or so, occasionally sitting down to take a break before moving on to the next hall. We peaked past every door with no avail and went up the stairs to check our room, picking up two apples on the way.

We took a short moment in our Seto-less bedroom to eat the fruits before continuing our search. About half an hour later, Mokuba and I opened the door of one of the smaller classrooms to _finally _see him…wining a chess match against Mr. Kaiba.

"Seto…what are you doing?" I frowned, a scolding tone creeping it's way into my words. But inwardly I was panicking.

Seto you idiot! Do you not know who this man is?! I bet he could kill us(or at least make us suffer in some way) if you piss him off!

Mokie grasped my skirt(because the caretakers insisted we dressed in our most proper clothes when meeting with Mr. Kaiba), hiding behind me at the appearance of a new person, his eyes peaking out at the business man. Our brother looked up and his victorious smirk turned into a soft smile, "Risa, Mokie, it seems that we've just been adopted by Mr. Kaiba. _All three of us._" he said in a cool voice, heavily emphasizing the last three words. How the heck did he say that so calmly-wait. What? _  
_

"What?" I repeated out loud, staring at Seto as if he'd grown two heads, "When?_ How?_"

"I won a chess game and the bet was adoption."

My eye twitched. Are you serious?! We got adopted by a _chess game!?_

…Wow. I thought that the owner of a big business company would be a bit smarter than that. But then again, _nobody _has ever really beat Seto in a chess game(of course, the only people that had ever played against Seto were around our age and I had no idea how to play). Darting out from behind my legs, Mokuba cheered and ran up to hug our brother, who stiffened for a moment before hugging back while I just stood in the doorway, gaping dumbly.

The paperwork was done in an hour and we were going to be picked up tomorrow to go home-_home._

_We had a home now-_what happened fully hit me and I tackle-hugged Seto. "OMGTHANKYOUSOMUCH!" I screamed and proceeded to cuddle to life out of both of my brothers. A few hours later, Seto got irritated and shoved me off him with a low growl of "Stop that!"

You think I listened to him? Pfft. No.

**(Extra)**

"…Seto?"

"Yeah?"

"Did you cheat?"

"…"

"…"

"…"

"…"

"Seto?"

"Maybe."

* * *

_Yes yes, I know I haven't updated or touched this story in a long time-but I was editing everything else!_

_I hope this is a better quality than before, and thanks to all the favorites, follows and reviews._

_Hope to see you in the next chapter~_


	3. Chapter 3: And so it starts

"Urggggggg." I softly groaned as the bright sun's evil rays of doom pierced through my eyelids and turned to face the pillow, snuggling deeper inside of the warm covers. With a small mental smile at beating mother nature and the absence of light, I started to sink back into the comfortable abyss of sleep.

Five seconds later, the blanket was violently dragged off of me.

Instantly, my hand shot out and grasped it before my other appendage imitated the action. I sent a sleepily glare towards the offender, Seto, who just returned it with one of his goddamn cocky smirks.

"Seto…" I hissed, putting as much venom as I could into my voice while Mokuba shivered and curled up closer to me. God knows this place doesn't have heaters in any room, and it was currently early fall, which meant that it was colder than usual.

He dropped the blanket and I pulled it back over our cooling bodies as Seto rolled his eyes, seeming unaffected by the morning chill. Like some kind of demon. Which he was.

"Remember whats gonna happen today?"

No...I don't-oh.

Right. We got adopted.

My anger dissipated in a moment and I switched my grasp over to Seto's arm, taking him by surprise as I dragged him onto the bed. Quickly climbing over him, I threw my leg over his with a big grin and made sure that he was trapped in between Mokuba and I.

With an irritated sigh, he started to struggle against my grasp. "Risa…We have to get up! We're getting picked up at eight and it's already six thirty!"

"Stop being so stiff, we still have an hour and a half, don't we?"

"But-" I cut him off, "Just thirty more minutes. We'll have enough time."

He let out a defeated breath and made himself comfortable in the sheets, "Fine. But the moment it turns seven, we _are _waking up."

I gave a half hearted nod of agreement and we settled down.

True to his word, the moment the clock read seven in it's bright red numbers, Seto dragged us all out of bed and we got dressed. With the bag from when we first entered the orphanage, we packed up everything we owned along with carrying a couple of objects like Mokuba's bouncy ball. Downstairs, I cooked them some french toast and we sat in the 'living room', waiting for Mr. Kaiba(I don't know his first name yet...) to arrive. A couple of early-bird orphans gave us glares, but didn't say anything.

I was buzzing with excitement...Oh my gosh, we finally had a home! Someone to take care of us-and they were rich to boot! Oh, I wonder how our names will sound!

Risa Kaiba…Mokuba Kaiba…Seto Kaiba-_Seto Kaiba__. _I…I know that name.

Wha…What-**_Yugioh._**

All of the sudden, memories rushed to me. Seto kaiba, Mokuba, Yugioh, a short main character, golden items, trading cards. Its been nearly three(ten, if you count this life) years since the last time I watched that show and I could barely remember the plot-but this. _This._

_I…I was reborn into Yugioh. An anime. A _show.

"Risa-nee?" The sound of Mokie's soft voice temporarily snapped me out of the thoughts and I turned to stare at him, looking at his fluffy black hair and pale skin a whole different way. Did this mean that none of this...of him...of us, was real?

Wait...

Is this all...

A dream?

I felt panic tighten in my chest, and my breathing got short. The walls felt as if they were closing in on me.

No, they can't be a dream! They had to be real! I can't...WHAT WILL I DO IF THEY DON'T EXIST?!

"R-Risa-nee?" His voice stuttered a bit as he shrunk back from the intense look in my eyes, "Risa? What's wrong?"

Tearing my gaze from Mokuba, I faced Seto. This would be the famous Seto Kaiba. I could distantly remember his exaggerated white outfit and almost giggled. Instead a small smile formed on my lips, and I felt like crying.

Please let this be reality.

Please.

"Risa!" Seto snapped at me, lightly hitting my head with his palm.

I squeezed my eyes shut and opened them again.

"Seto. Pinch me please"

He blinked in confusion, but shrugged. Grabbing the skin of my arm, he dug his nails in until I yelped.

"OMG SETO DID YOU REALLY HAVE TO DO IT THAT HARD I THINK I'M BLEEDING DAMMIT."

"What. You told me to pinch you."

*sniff* "You cruel, cruel creature."

"You know me the best, Risa."

I sighed, but felt my head clear.

That's right.

They might of been characters from a show once upon a time, but now they were real. Real, talking, breathing humans with feelings. Not just drawings and animations made by artists and editors anymore.

Most importantly, they were my brothers-and this didn't change that fact.

I took a deep breath and pulled Mokie into my lap, hugging him while Seto calmly questioned me.

"What was that? Are you alright?" I just inched closer to him and leaned my head on his shoulder, "Nothing. It was nothing."

I paused for a second before adding, at Seto's unsure face, "Just excited to be finally adopted."

A few minutes, in which we passed by playing random games, went by and we heard the faint crackling sound of gravel being crushed from under heavy black rubber tires. Slowly standing up with Seto, I helped Mokuba up as we gathered our stuff.

The doorknob turned and the brown wooden door pushed in with a soft creak to reveal a sharply dressed, brown-haired butler who stepped aside before Mr. Kaiba strolled in.

Almost on instinct, my back straitened.

For what I remember, Mr. Kaiba was _not _a good man. That he scarred Seto for life or something, I couldn't remember. But it wasn't pretty.

All of the sudden, the wonderful adoption where we were suppose to be taken into a nice, luxurious home didn't seem that tempting anymore. In fact, in a split second, this whole thing turned into a nightmare. One that I would have to deal with for a couple of years-I hope I'll be able to keep my brothers safe…although it was highly unlikely.

Mr. Kaiba looked us over before ordering in a harsh(to me, at least), booming voice, "Ray, collect the children's things and put them in the back. The other man nodded and walked towards us as Mr. Kaiba motioned for us to follow him. With a quick glance towards our luggage, we did. The moment my eyes fell on the sight before me, I could feel my excitement flicker, and roar.

There was a shiny, black _limousine,_ limousine! And we would get to _ride _in it!

Mr. Kaiba went ahead and stepped into the car before staring out at us impatiently. Mokuba was the first one to break the trance with a squeal of excitement and bounced to the limo, as Seto and I followed. Another butler opened the door for us and I froze again at the sight of the inside.

Comfy yet professional looking black leather seats lined the sides and the dark ceiling was scattered with small white lights, making it look like a sky of stars. The floor slowly changed colors-and there was a bar! A FRIGGIN BAR!

We were loaded in and I gingerly sat down on the soft leather, fearing that I would stain the seat with my old dirty clothes, with Mokuba while everyone else piled in and the door shut behind us. There was so much room…OMG THIS WAS AWESOME! The car smoothly started up with a soft purr a moment later and then we were on our way.

There was an awkward silence for the rest of the ride. Mr. Kaiba didn't make any indication of wanting to know us better, so instead we kept quiet and huddled together as the atmosphere became an awkward sort of tense.

When we arrived at our destination and cast our eyes upon the mansion for the first time, I could feel my breath be taken away. But then again, it was probably because my heart momentarily stopped.

It was a _mansion. _A big, white mansion with many, many windows behind a tall, beautiful, intricate, black iron-wrought gate. God, I should of expected this from a rich, what? Millionaire? Kajillionare? I don't know, but he was _loaded!_

We were ushered inside, being basically dragged along as my head frantically whipped around, trying to take in as much as I could while my brothers just looked on with wonder. A exciting stroll later, we were faced with the sight of a lovely ivory-colored door carved with amazing, symmetrical designs on either side. The moment we stepped onto the front steps, it opened and the a whole line of maids on the left and right stood. Behind them was a large hall with a big, brilliant sparkling crystal chandelier hanging over it along with a long, thick red velvet carpet lined in gold laying on the spotless, shiny marble floor as we walked in.

The we were lead down the extravagant, red coated stairs to another set across the room. Climbing up _those, _Mr. Kaiba faced towards the left. and walked down the carpeted hallway. "These shall be your rooms," He said, gesturing down the hall, which was lined with six doors, three on each side. "You may choose whichever ones you wish. The maids will be by soon with a new change of clothing."

He turned and walked a few feet before stopping and adding, "Lunch is in two hours."

Once his footsteps faded away, we stood in silence for a moment before, hesitantly, Seto reached out and opened up the first door as we all looked in with amazement. The room would of been able to fit at least _three _of the dining rooms in the orphanage side by side, had a large, clean, _king-size_ bed up against the wall, nightstands, drawers, a HUGE closet, and even a couple cushy, padded chairs! The floor was also carpeted and fluffy, and there was even a private bathroom!

We exchanged excited glances before hurrying and opening all the doors, looking into all the rooms.

They all had pretty much the same design and items, although some were rearranged in different positions to fit the direction the room faced. In the end, Seto decided on the second room on the right, I got the room facing his on the left, and Mokuba had the room next to mine. There was a bit of a debate on where our old covers would go as we had new sheets now before it landed a spot in Seto's closet.

Just like Mr. Kaiba said, maids came by a few minutes after we've put away all our things. They bowed before telling us that Mr. Kaiba required us to take a bath before getting in our new outfits and that they would be standing outside our door in case we wanted help.

So the three of us went to the bathroom and started filling up the ginormous ivory hot tub. We experimented with pouring in different body washes until colorful bubbles nearly spilled over the top.

I checked the water temperature before giving the ok.

In five seconds flat we had stripped off our clothes and were fully submerged into the tub. I took a moment to relax and admire the beauty of the bathroom before motioning for Mokuba to come over. As he settled down in front of me, I picked out the shampoo and drizzled some onto my hand. Bringing it to Mokie's head, I started to scrub it into his hair, determined to clean every strand as Seto did the same to his own head.

After rinsing off the shampoo, I conditioned his hair before switching the job to Seto as he had finished, and doing my own hair. When everything was cleaned, we drained the dirty bath water and redrew it.

We relaxed and chatted, and I felt as if all my worries were washed away in the water, until our skin wrinkled like prunes and we had to get out.

Wrapping(warm, fluffy, colorful, large, _absolutely amazing)_ towels around ourselves, we went back into the room and

I blinked at how color-coordinated our clothes were. Seto received a light blue button up shirt, white slacks, a white suit coat, and shiny black formal shoes. Mokuba got the same, except his shirt was green and it was all in a smaller size. I got a white dress with a pink bow and frills at the bottom, a short pink jacket, pink tights, and white shoes that had a tiny bit of heel.

It wasn't too complicated, so we managed to get dressed fairly quickly.

When we walked out the door, the maids greeted us before leading us to the dining room. As we stood before the entrance, I checked over our appearances one more time, nervously, tucking a especially wild strand of Mokuba's hair down.

The maids opened the doors.

I tried to push down my nerves.

Mr. Kaiba was already there, sitting at one end of a slightly long table as he gestured for us to sit on the other. Maids pulled out the chair and we did as we were told. Seto ended up sitting at the head with me on his left and Mokuba and his right.

As if on cue, servants came in rolling trolleys, stopping them by the table and setting out platters of food that they slowly uncovered. My mouth started watering at the sight of food and other thoughts were pushed to the back of my head.

It wasn't exactly a feast, but it was pretty close. There was a variety of things including jumbo shrimp, steak, lobster, salad, ham, corn, and rolls-just to name a few. The scent wafted over to me and I nearly groaned in happiness. I mean, my cooking was fine, but I only knew about five proper recipes and then a bunch of random experiments. This, however, was high quality, delicious, and _new._

Unsure if I was allowed to get my food yet, I decided to wait until Mr. Kaiba got his share. Seto seemed to get the same idea as he was staring intently at the billionaire.

The moment our step-dad finished piling food onto his plate, we dove in. Politely, of course.

A little bit after we started eating, Mr. Kaiba broke the silence. "Tomorrow all of you will start your classes. A schedule will be sent to you."

We nodded as our mouths were stuffed full with food, and dinner continued. Mr. Kaiba finished first, leaving the table without a word.

When we got done, we returned to our rooms and stood in front of our doors, feeling a awkward since this would be the first time we slept apart in, what, three years? Finally, Seto broke the tension by biding us a soft goodnight that we returned before going into our rooms.

Closing the door behind me, I flicked on the lights, feeling a little lonely. Walking over to my bed, I saw that a cream nightgown had already been laid out for me. Taking off my clothes and folding them, I placed them on the ground before slipped on the sleeping wear. It settled on me comfortably, loose yet fitting.

I turned off the lights and climbed into bed, relishing in the softness and warmth that engulfed me. The mattress was extremely soft, and my body sunk into it with pleasure. I pulled up my blankets until it rested just beneath my chin and stared at the ceiling, hoping to fall asleep soon.

A few moments passed before I turned on my side and tried closing my eyes, doing my best to clear my mind.

When that didn't work either, I sighed and sat up, pumping my pillow before falling back on it.

The room seemed much more menacing than it did in the daylight. It was so big, so..._empty. _I felt strangely cold, even though the room was warm and I had all my covers on me.

It's like something's missing. There's this..._space. _Why is there so much space on this bed? It's able to fit more than three grown adult males! Who needs all this room when they sleep anyway? It's unnerving.

...

I wonder how Mokuba's doing.

Maybe I should check up on him?

What if he's lonely? Scared?

Yeah he should still be at that age where he's afraid of the dark(I chose to ignore the fact that Mokuba never showed any signs of having a problem sleeping in the dark).

...

Exactly three minutes and twenty seven seconds(I know because I counted) passed before I finally gave in and threw off my blankets. Walking to my door, I opened it and went to Mokuba's room. Slowly opening his door, I peeked in and blinked in surprise and confusion when I saw that he was no where to be found. Which meant...

Against my will a small smile broke out onto my lips as I tried not to dash to Seto's room.

Softly entering, I watched with glee both as of my brother's heads turning towards me. Gently shutting the door behind me, I climbed in the bed with them.

The moment I felt pressed up against another body, the empty disconcerting vortex finally disappeared and I exhaled in relief.

"I was going to get you Risa-nee, but Seto told me to wait!" Mokie's voice chirped softly and I raised an eyebrow at my older brother. He gave me a smirk in return, smugness painted across his face.

I rolled my eyes.

Oh yes, the great Seto knew everything. Murmuring a "goodnight", I shut my eyes and fell asleep in no time.

Hell began tomorrow.

If only I knew how bad it would of been.

* * *

_WOOOOOOO_

_GUESS WHO'S HERE WITH AN UPDATEEEEEE?!_

THIS CHICK.

_UM, I ACTUALLY DON'T KNOW WHEN UPDATES ARE COMING, BUT I LOVE THIS STORY. AGAIN PLEASE TELL ME IF ANYTHING'S WRONG(as this story is un-beta'd and I have a short attention span)._

_LOOK FORWARD TO ZE NEXT CHAPTER!_


	4. Chapter 4: The emotional diary-coaster

I'M SO SORRY GUYS I HAVEN'T UPDATED IN SO LONG BUT WHEN I CAME BACK TO MY FANFICS, ALL OF MY DOCUMENTS HAD BEEN DELETED BECAUSE THEY WEREN'T GETTING RE-SUBMITTED REGULARLY. ;-;

SO THEN I HAD TO REWRITE THE CHAPTER.

SOB.

WELL, HERE YOU GO.

I WROTE THIS IN TWO DAYS SO DON'T JUDGE. IM SURE ITS PRETTY CRAP.

MERRY CHRISTMAS OR WHATEVER.

* * *

Hell: Year 1, day 37.

Dear Diary, or something like that. I'm suppose to write in this thing for English class, which is a bit pointless because the teacher never checks it anyway. But I guess I might as well document some things to look back in future years. Maybe it'll crack a few smiles.

Better make this funny then...

Ok fine screw this method of trying to be creative. Can't say I didn't try.

It's been more than five weeks since we've been 'adopted' into the Kaiba household, and it's been, honestly? Terrible.

The first week or so wasn't that bad. Mr. Kaiba had to arrange teachers for all of us so in the mean time we got to relax and have fun. Then reality smashed into our face like a bad pie prank Sunday morning when we were rudely woken at freaking five o'clock for surprise goddamn lessons.

Then guess what?

We didn't even get to take the goddamn lessons together! Ok maybe that wasn't like the end of the world, but the lessons would of been much more bearable if they were there with me.

You know what I get the logic of it and all just ok please I don't need to start rambling.

Sorry if this 'diary entry' seems a bit rushed, I only have about ten minutes of break before I have to go on to my next lesson-which is dancing of all things! I know it's like the 2000s or something but I don't want to dance! It's horrible! I would rather sit at my desk and paint then go through another set of pliés. It's honestly really bor-

XxX

It's night now, same day. Sorry, I had to stop writing because Mrs. Pinched-Face-With-A-Ballat-Shoe-Shoved-Up-Her-Ass was calling for me. And if I'm late she forces me to stay after and do 15 extra sets of 'Chainné turns'. Slowly too, and it has to be exactly on point-which just wastes a bunch of time and my whole schedule is set back some.

Anyway, I might as well tell you my aforementioned schedule and rant because Seto isn't back yet and Mokuba's doing some of his homework. I usually stay up and wait for Seto to get back before we get ready for bed, so it'a an hour or so of waiting. Enough to write this and then finish my homework.

Alright, so I wake up at Five O'clock everyday and get an hour for dressing and eating.

At six is The Proper English Class for a Young Lady, seven is piano class, and at eight is Math.

Then I get a short ten minute break and next at eight ten is ballet.

Nine o'clock is Science studies, ten is History, eleven thirty is Proper Etiquette, and then we break at one o'clock for dinner.

After that, it's two o'clock for violin lessons, three was _suppose_ to be for reading classes, but as I didn't need those, it's currently my free time for an hour. Yay. More time to work on homework and wander around because I'm not allowed to interrupt Seto and Mokuba's classes.

Four is art(which I actually do enjoy),

Five is business management,

six is, basically, gym.

I have thirty minutes of free time(to take a shower) and then go down at seven thirty to have dinner.

After that, I'm free! So here I am, it's currently eight twenty one, and Mokuba has started to color. I think he's drawing a flower, but I'm not sure.

Oh right, good news is, we get to have weekends off! They assign more homework, but we get to sleep in and spend more time together.

All in all, life here isn't too bad I guess. Maybe I was wrong about Mr. Kaiba? Was that another show I was thinking about? Anyway, I should be getting to work soon. The lessons aren't too bad, and I'm living in a luxury house with plumbing and heating, so I guess I shouldn't be complaining to much. I guess it just feels weird not seeing Seto and Mokuba for most of the day. Sometimes, I get anxious, wondering what they're doing, but then I can't go and reassure myself because I'm usually in the middle of a class. That part sucks, I guess.

And of course there's the obvious hatred of doing school work.

Well, I'll write to you later.

-Risako Kaiba

XxX

Hell: Year 1, day 92

It's been quiet around the house recently, as if everyone is on an uneasy edge. Mr. Kaiba(I refuse to call him 'Father'. Only when I need to for show) hasn't sat down at the dinner table for two days now. I asked a housekeeper where he was, but all she said was that someone important to Mr. Kaiba had a problem and that he was off to fix it. I don't know what it is or when he'll get back.

He hasn't been too terrible to us, so I suppose I'll wish him good luck on whatever it is that ails him.

...

For some reason that sentence seemed a bit more formal than usual. Oh my gosh I think the classes are actually working!

No!

I must think of ways to combat this.

(But on a more serious hand, I feel like somethings about to happen. There's a tension in the air that always feels like it's about to break. It's been making me jittery. I hope nothing bad happens.

Oh, I just jinxed it, didn't I?

Better go knock on some wood.)

XxX

Hell: Year 1 Day 213

I think...I might have a thing for British people...

Dammit.

I...don't really know what to do. I don't even know if I really care that I like British people.

Why?

Shut up.

That's why.

XxX

Hell: Year 1 Day 214

I thought about it and realized that I in fact didn't care.

XxX

Hell: Year 1 Day 324

The atmosphere has shifted again. I don't know in what way, I just know that Seto's been coming back later and later. I don't know what type of classes he's taking, but honestly. That boy only gets about five hours of sleep! I hope they'll loosen up on him soon...

I suddenly felt guilty. I feel as if I'm not spending enough time with my brothers, like they'll all start to drift apart from me, apart from each other.

But there's nothing I can do about it, and it's one of the worst parts.

The feeling of being completely and utterly helpless.

The frustration of not seeing my brothers, my only family for god's sake, often enough.

Maybe they(Or I guess technically Mr. Kaiba) will be more lax as we grow older? I can only hope for now.

XxX.

The fires of eternal hatred and pain: Year 2, Day 14

I...I.

I just.

I want to kill Gozaburo.

Not even Mr. Kaiba anymore-he doesn't deserve any type of title.

Take a deep breath, yes, ok.

Let me start to explain.

So, apparently Seto is now the official 'male heir' and as such has to follow a stricter schedule. And by stricter schedule, I mean he's basically a dead body every time Mokuba and I see him. Not that we get to see him much anymore. In fact we see him even less than usual-which is saying quite a lot.

He wakes up at four in the morning now, and gets back at twelve in the night.

Four hours.

Four freaking hours of sleep.

And that's not even counting homework hours.

And then when he comes back, we're all sleeping anyway so it's not as if we can talk to him or anything.

I just...

Feel lost.

XxX

Ihatethatsonofabitchgozaburosogoddamnmuch Year 2 Day 58

Seto informed us during dinner that he didn't have the weekends off anymore.

XxX

Year 2 Day 59

I feel like shit. I started crying yesterday when I got back to our room before promptly passing out in a mountain of wadded up tissues.

My eyes are puffy, and I probably look like a mess.

This hopelessness feels like it's crushing me.

XxX

Year 2 Day 288

You know how I used to call this 'Hell' in my earlier entries? I feel like a complete and utter fool. A brat. I took what I had for granted, and now I wish that I relished that time when I still could.

...

Seto has gotten all his toys taken away.

...

The card games he loves to play, especially his Duel Monsters. I had to look away when he told us that because I didn't want to see the look on his face. It would of ruined me.

Do you know how much he loves those games? We all had something to help hold us down in this world, to pick us up when everything felt desolate. When we had our fears and our worries, we all had that something to lean back on and forget our troubles, even if it was just temporarily.

For Seto, that was card games-be it anything from poker to goldfish. They all worked his genius brain up into a frenzy, putting all his focus on winning.

To imagine what it be like, being forced through such a vicious cycle with no distractions available-no relaxation at all, was despairing. For god's sake he was only twelve years old.

He was only...Twelve years old.

Twelve.

Oh shit the tears are coming again.

Dammit why am I so emotional? Now, nearly every day, I feel like sobbing.

There's this constant gloom on my chest that'll remain as long as I see Seto like this. My own lessons have become harder, but I stay up some nights and try to help him with whatever I can-whether it be drawing the bath for him or helping write up an essay. I just cant stand it anymore, that way he looks at us with these exhausted eyes and gives us a weak smile before working like a madman on his homework, passing out at like one in the morning, and then repeating the process the next day. It's horrifying and scary and makes me nauseous because even when I beg him to sleep he refuses. Because he gets beat if he doesn't turn in his work on time, it's like a perpetual cycle that only gets worse and worse-and I fear the day it finally has to break.

I've seen the swollen red welts he's guilty tried to hide inside his sleeve, as if it branded him as some sort of criminal. Or maybe he just doesn't want us to worry.

I feel like laughing at that last sentence.

He doesn't want us to worry?

I don't even have an answer to that. I can't even fully express my emotions, because there are somethings you just can't explain without feeling.

But , I will say this.

Every single time I see one of those motherfucking marks-from the angry whip lines to thin cuts under his chin, I have to leave the room so I wouldn't go crazy. I think I already am crazy.

This was the exact example of why threatening to hurt one's loved ones is sometimes more effective than hurting that person themselves.

I felt like I was getting ripped into a thousand little pieces, from inside out. If I truly was in the aforementioned situation, I would spill everything I knew and then some if it wasn't good enough. Nothing compares to my brothers-they are worth more to me than anything, and I mean it with all my heart.

And all I want to do is slit Gozaburo's throat-no wait. That death is too quick.

I want him to suffer what we did, I want him to experience every single inch of our pain and more. I want him to feel this heavy weight on my heart that makes it hard to breathe. But I guess I can't, as he doesn't have a heart.

Oh god I feel like I'm going to suffocate. I want to skin him and shake his own entrails in his face before forcing it down his throat. I want...I want...

I want to calm down.

I'll...I'll rewrite a poem I was reading today in English class, then. Maybe that'll help.

_Peace. _

_It does not mean to be in a place where there is no noise, trouble, or hard work._

_ It means to be in the midst of those things and still be calm in your heart._

I don't remember who it was by...actually, no. I read it from a book of anonymous words. It's a pretty nice work I guess.

Here's another one,

_They found my body_

_At the bottom_

_Of the deep blue sea_

_But my_

_Thoughts and emotions_

_Floated to the surface_

_And spelled_

_"I am Free"_

_-KS_

XxX

Year 2 Day 291

Last night, I help Mokuba draw a Duel Monsters card for Seto today. That sweet little cream puff, I just love him so much.

Then we slipped it into his deck and hid the whole things into a hollowed out book(there were a surprising amount of those hidden here and there. We've found a couple..._interesting _things in them...).

Mokuba scribbled out this adorable little note that made me want to cry and we left it out for him.

Then this morning we found a reply. I'll tape it in here.

_One day, I'll get a real Blue Eyes._

_Never lose hope._

I'm afraid.

That I might of already.

XxX

Year 2 Day 363

We went to a ball today. It was hosted by some random rich snob that wanted to throw some sort of big New Year's party with all the other richies under the guise of it being a charity ball.

I'm ten now...I guess I'd skipped my birthdays, didn't I? Well they weren't really eventful. Just Seto, Mokuba, and I staying up until two in the morning just to play some smuggled card games and eat cake. It was nice, but I had felt so bad for taking away Seto's sleep time I didn't get to enjoy myself as much as I should have.

Anyway, so we entered this glittering golden ballroom, blah blah blah, and then Gozaburo showed us off to his friends like we were some kind of trophy. The usual, I guess. We've been to a couple parties before, but this one stood out a little. For one, the lights went out in the middle of the event and everyone went crazy, which was a bit funny to watch-er, hear, I guess. Since we couldn't really see anything. But also, I realized that Gozaburo was grooming me to be so lady-like because he planned to marry me off to some other rich family like it was in the medieval times.

I guess there isn't really a use for me, as he already has two heirs. Fuck if I'd let him actually do it, but, as I've been quickly realizing, I don't have a choice. In this or anything else.

It was...disconcerting.

I wasn't really a human anymore, but rather a puppet pulled on strings, forced to bend to the will of whomever owned me.

...

I don't think I like that thought very much.

For some reason, I find myself caring less than I should have...

This place is destroying me.

I want to leave.

XxX

Year 3, Day 67

I stayed up and waited for Seto tonight.

We curled up on the bed, and I tucked my head under his chin as I told him I hated everything. I spilled out my soul to him, and he listened.

What did I ever do to deserve such a great big brother as him?

When I was done, he gave me a tissue and started murmuring to me. Murmuring of extravagant plans, of freedom and the taste of liberty. He wove dreams of soft grass, fresh air in our hair as we watched the sky rise and fall in an array of beauty with no burden on our shoulders, and he comforted me with promises that the three of us would be together then. Always.

I breathed in his stories with silent tears, as if they were the last thing keeping me alive, and took his visions as my own. My head was intoxicated with sweet words of futures and aspirations. Of joy and wonder and desire. Of everything good that could happen, that would happen.

And then, I felt filled with purpose again.

I felt _hope_.

And then I realized what what was pushing Seto along even through all his trails.

I guess that note held more than I thought.

XxX

Year 3 Day 72

I was stupid to think that we were stuck forever. That there was no changing our future.

I feel like laughing now, this feeling in my chest makes me giddy with happiness, because we _can _do something. Thoughts that give me a reason.

Oh Seto, you're much stronger than I am, and I have no words to thank you for that.

For the past few nights, I've listened to his schemes and input some thoughts. I don't know if I should actually put the plan down in a diary of all things, but I guess I'll just have to hide it well. Can't have anyone knowing of it, after all.

So, here it is,

Seto plans to overthrow Kaiba Corp.

And yes! I know it sounds incredibly silly and all(I did think that he was a bit loco when he first told me), but just listen!

Apparently, Seto made this virtual system thing-which really amazed me because Seto is truly a genius and it's sometimes hard for me to see that because he's my brother-but Gozaburo wanted to use it to kill a bunch of people and make a fortune like the greedy bastard he was. So then Seto lost his respect(that I couldn't believe he even had) for Gozaburo and decided to retaliate.

I felt like screaming because after all the shit that The Bastard had done to him, he only _just now _realized that Gozaburo was a piece of shit.

I guess I can't really blame him, though, as he had lived with this for a long time and, as all children do, are easily influence by those around him. Which made me every more pissed because _he's been so messed up that he'd thought what had happened so far was _normal. And that was only the things I knew too! I'm sure Gozaburo was crueler to him then he let on.

But not minding the absolute _wrongness _that was Seto's mindset, he's made a pretty good plan.

Seto had made a deal with The Big Five(the executives of KaibaCorp), where he told those power-hungry lowlifes that he would give them the 'respect that they deserved' and treat them better once he was in charge in return for their help.

Right now, they're gathering shares of Kaiba Corp.

I'll inform you of any updates in progress-however, I believe in Seto. If anyone can pull this off, then it's my brother-because the only one more desperate than me is him.

XxX

Year 3 Day 182

So far, we've gathered 49% of KaibaCorp, including my 3% and Seto's 7%-leaving Gozaburo with 49% and Mokuba with 2%. Which made Mokuba the tipping scale.

And then here comes the part I don't like as much.

Seto's still making sure that Gozaburo starts to know of our plan. He's dropping the hints subtly, so The Bastard wouldn't realize that it was all a set up. But then, Seto has to accuse Mokuba of telling Gozaburo and making him turn briefly against us-finding comfort in Gozaburo and making him think that he would win because of Mokie's shares.

The worst part was that we couldn't tell Mokuba that it was all a part of the plan, because he's just a little kid and I highly doubt his acting would be good enough to fool Gozaburo. That man was sly, and most of all,_ intelligent_. He had to be to succeed so much and get a company this big, after all.

But Mokuba supports Seto's dream of turning KaibaCorp into a gaming company when compared to a weapon manufacturing plant, and so he'll switch at the last minute. Not to mention that we're family, after all, and I've told Mokuba enough times that family always sticks together through thick and thin. He also knows that Seto loves him too, even if he doesn't show it that much.

This plan will be put into action once Seto is convinced that Gozaburo gets the idea.

I'm getting more nervous.

...

Seto stop reading over my shoulder I know you're there.

...

He just said that it was ok to be a little nervous because it convinces Gozaburo mo-ASDEFAKBAIRE OMG STERP TICLINGKING ME I sWAER IEM GEIGN TAE MERUCEDR YUO SETO!

(the rest of the text is an illegible mess of scribbles and curses) (1)

XxX

Year 3 Day 213

EEEEE-

IT HAPPENED.

IT HAPPENED EXACTLY ACCORDING TO PLAN.

WE WON BY 51% PERCENT, AND SETO GOT FULL CONTROL OF THE COMPANY. I FEEL LIKE THE WORLD COULD END RIGHT NOW AND I WOULDN'T EVEN GIVE A SINGLE SHIT.

OK OK Ok I need to calm down take deep breathes deep breathes.

Oh god can I even explain this feeling? It seems as if this whole diary entry has been an emotional roller coaster and this is that satisfying end where you swear to never get on again. But there's this swell in my chest that makes me want to bounce off the walls. In fact, the first thing we did once we finished with the official papers was run outside and roll down a hill giggling and screaming in joy.

We got grass stains and dirt smeared all over our clothes but we didn't care because no one could tell us what to do anymore. We were _free._

I'm afraid I'll have to end this(possibly last) entry right here. The sun's starting to set and Seto and Mokuba are waiting for me.

Tonight, the starts are brighter than I've ever seen.

* * *

_(1) Risako was trying to write: "He just said that it was ok to be a little nervous because it convinces Gozaburo mo_*cue start of ticking*_ OMG STOP TICKLING I SWEAR IM GOING TO MURDER YOU SETO! "_

_So tell me what you guys think about the Diary entry type of text. It was originally normal narration but then that got deleted and I couldn't even remember what I put down so it turned into this._

_A reader kinda wanted me to speed things up, so I tried not to get into too much detail. This is the last chapter of their past. Plot starts in the next one :D_

_(However feel free to tell me if you want me to extend the past because I could I guess)_

_But seriously I made this in less than 48 hours please please please tell me if anythings wrong I beg you._


	5. Please Read

Hey guys! Sorry this isn't an update, but I'm still here.

I've decided that it was really hard(and stupid) for me to manage two fanfiction accounts, so I'm moving this fic over to my main one. The username is 'crumpledpaper'(link in profile) and Risako will be moved to and updated on that account instead of this. But I'll still leave this version up because I don't want to delete all your lovely reviews.

Hopefully, this way, I'll be able to update more as my files won't keep getting deleted because I almost never check this account. Along with that, Risako will be revised as I looked back on some of the things I wrote and nearly cringed to death.

Thank you for understanding.

This doesn't mean Risako is discontinued, it'll just be moved to a different account, and I will still be writing new chapters.

See you guys soon!

-PepperminTwists


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